A little of everything(:

just don't know.

2010-09-16T00:54:00.001-07:00

well I didn't go to school today, I felt horrible..when I woke up I felt like I got hit with a brick when I was sleeping lol it didn't feel to great, well I guess everything I plan never goes good, I'm grounded now :/ I hate living here. well my plans were to have stephanie and estivaliz come home with me' then my mom take us to the movies and we meet up with janet and kj I wanna hang out with him because j want a bf, but I wanna take it slow. then after we go to the movies we go to wal mart then mcdonalds. then after that me' Janet and Stephanie all spend the night with estivaliz and get drunk off tequila lol it was gonna be soo much fun but of coarse my mom always ruins my plans I can't take her sometimes, I feel like I wanna slip everyone sleeping pills and go out and have a good time I think I deserve it(: I havnt been bad. lol it's time to be a little bad tho. well that's all I got for this blog.!

Sumthin new.

2010-09-12T21:36:00.001-07:00

Well nothing much has really happened, I havnt blogged lately because of school I've been really tired and havnt wanted to do anything. Well last night I was talking to Jacob I just don't know anymore I think we r just gonna call it quits and move on because I guess we relize our relationship won't be very strong. But idk I love him still and just don't want to make the wrong choice. Well I have a date with kj on Friday so I'll see how that goes but blehh I just have alot to think about and process well that's all I got to blog about today.. :3

:(

2010-09-05T14:24:00.001-07:00

Hmmm.. Well I was talking to Omar last night and he wants to go straight and when he grows up he wants a family, and he says he can't have that with a guy, well today I was talking to him and tellin him how fkn stupid he is to force himself to be something he's not! Welli was telling him he could still have a family with a guy there's lots of other options well he listened and I hope he realizes that now. Well later on today he asked me out and I guess he doesn't listen to me cuzz if he did he would remember our conversation about how I didn't wanna hurt him that's why I didn't wanna date him again cuzz I am still i'n love with Jacob but honestly I just don't know anymore cuzz I don't feel the same about him anymore :( like I still love him and all just not as much as I did and like how he said he wants to come and see me I think what if I fall head over heels for him again and I just couldn't do that to Omar so I think it's best if I stay single for now and wait and see what happens I'm just gonna go with the flow and focus on school.. That's pretty much all I can do for now..

9/4/10

2010-09-04T15:04:00.001-07:00

Hmm.. Today wasn't really 'all that' I havnt done much at all, well I made a funnel cake it was pretty good well I did some chores and watched some tv, that was pretty much my day well tonight is still i'n the planning I think I might be going out with some friends and go to the movies were gonna go see paranas lol I heard it's pretty dumb but I still wanna see it, my moms pretty strict she Sony let me do anything ever sence I got caught smoking weed well I guess I can't blame her but I really hope she trusts me again some day, lol even tho she used to smoke alot when she was a teen I don't get why she don't trust me to be responsible but I guess that's just her so that's pretty much my day(:

My life??

2010-09-03T21:42:00.001-07:00

Well I was born on the 29th of july I am 14 years old I love to hang out with friends, I'm not really into sports, I have two sisters one brother and wich I'm the youngest it really sucks but I make it threw, I am easy to get along with as well I'm easy to hate I fight alot not cuz I start shit with people but cuz of dumb reasons like 'i heard u been talkin shit' kinds of reasons but if I'm gonna talk shut I'll say it to ur face! I don't go out lookin for a fight like some people do, I just take up for myself.. I am smart I like school just not the work like last year I can do it if I try but I just don't wanna but now I have to or I can't graduate.. But oh well school will be over for good before I know it and I know I will miss it so I guess I'll make the best out of it, I don't do 'hook ups' cuz I don't wanna waste my time I wanna find the one and never let him go.! I love mexican food wich is my favorite food, I play piano, I used to smoke weed but not anymore, I am a good kid but I like to be bad (; parents like me and trust me so I don't look like that 'pot head' type, so that's pretty much all about my life..

The boyfriend issues..

2010-09-03T21:24:00.001-07:00

Well this is how it goes, I fell head over heels for this guy (Jacob) he was sweet amazing cute smart and everything I have ever wanted we started our long distance relationship on the third of July and it lasted over a month and almost a week I have never believed i'n long distance relationships before cuzz I was scared I'd never get to see them, but it was different with him he was 17 about to be 18 he was lookin for a guy to fall i'n love with and I was everything he wanted and we had the greatest connection and he was gettin his car after his birthday and could come see me whenever he wanted, so I thought he was worth waiting for.. Well a month passed buy we fell deeply i'n love then he started having craves for sex and he thought maybe we should of went official after we met so he decided to take part but he said it was only temporary so I agreed to it, well a week passed and I was talkin on the phone with him and he acted so strange.! So I thought Maybe he lost feelings for me so I asked him and he said yes he did, I was so shocked. Well a couple of days later I asked him how he lost feelings so fast and of coarse he said he didn't know, and he wasn't sure what he wanted to do anymore.. Well a week later we got i'n an argument and he told me to move on, well I tried my best to but I can't and yesterday he told me that after all this time apart it made him realize how much he loves and misses me, and he still wants to go see me.. And I just don't know cuz I don't wanna get hurt again and another problem is Omar he's so sweet and I can't hurt him I just couldn't do that to him because he loves me and would do anything for me so for that I just don't know what to do, so I have alot to think about cuz I can't make the wrong choice ): I just hope I pick the right one..

9/3/10

2010-09-03T21:05:00.001-07:00

Ehh, today went great at school today(: I got pop corn and a coke i'n class well my hs 101 class which was kinda wierd sence mr Dennis is a dick head lol but we dis earn it sence we helped the janitors, alot of people were pretty sad still sence the p.e coach died yesterday i'n a motorcycle accident, it's really sad what happened but I was i'n amaze of how many people were attached to that teacher when it's barely the 3rd week of school or just maybe some people
Armt good with death. But I have only met the coach once but it was still very sad. Well when I got home things went great until my mom got nosey nn thought I was talkin to my dad and it was my friend and made a bug deal about it then my brother that's 28 that still lives with us cuz he has mental issues got i'n a fight with me, he ended up with the most dammage to the face but oh well.. So thus was pretty much my day(: